Henry's Journal

A young Henry My birthdate is 2nd April 98 so I'm an Aries. This picture shows me snoozing at the age of about 3 months.

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Latest news - January 1999

Those humans have really done it this time - they've gone and decided to get another cat. I had to protest in the strongest possible terms. Now that tis strange white create has been here a while, I'm gettng quite fond of her.

What I'm doing now

Between entering catwalk conments I'm fighting my human mother figure for control of an old Palm Sunday cross that the humans once used as a bookmark.

My daily routine

I wake up first, usually about 5:30, though I'm gradually realising that this is fairly pointless as the male human doesn't do anything useful until about 7:10 when my inadequate breakfast is served in the very finest beige porcelain.

About 9 o'clock, the lady human pours out some wonderful kitty milk, but apart from that I'm made to starve until the evening - they've reduced me to two meals a day! Occasionally supper includes special treats such as turkey, left-over fresh fish, or a sliver of Parmesan cheese.

The exertions of breakfast make a chap thoroughly somnolent, so the next few hours have to be spent on a sofa with head down and legs dangling off the edge. My favourite catnip-scented mouse often catches forty winks at the same time.

A garden stroll Just before luncheon I survey my estate for an hour or so and correct any erroneous flower planting ideas that I notice, and chase away those of the insect persuasion who attempt to invade. I now roam out of the garden, and like to check out the riverbank and a few neighbouring gardens. I've noticed a few chaps who look like me, but haven't met them properly yet.

In the middle of the day, the serious sleep of the day, 'el siesta', takes place. This can sometimes last until the male human comes through the front door with that Samsonite that I love to climb on; but sometimes I manage to rouse myself in time for another dash around the garden and a spot of tea.

The evening always includes a session of "physical jerks". These can include:

My favourite toy of all (and I have a few) is the kitchen tap, Water is completely fascinating - I can happily watch a dripping tap for hours. I still don't quite understand why the back of my head gets wet when I look under the tap to see where the water goes.

At bedtime I may sleep in my own basket downstairs, or on top of the drinks cabinet (7 ft) in the lounge. If I'm feeling more sociable, I go and kill human feet under the eiderdown before grabbing a patch of pillow when some chump is gullible enough to move his head.

Weight progression

These measurements are now ended except for occasional uses of bathroom scales - I'm too big for the kitchen ones.
Date Weight
2 April 98 5 oz Playing under the Christmas tree
5 June 98 1 lb 10 oz
13 June 98 1 lb 14 oz
19 June 98 2 lb 1 oz
27 June 98 2 lb 5 oz
5 July 98 2 lb 11 oz (burp!)
10 July 98 3 lb 0 oz
18 July 98 3 lb 4 oz
24 July 98 3 lb 12 oz
31 July 98 4 lb 1 oz
7 August 98 4 lb 7 oz
14 July 98 4 lb 12 oz
21 August 985lb 3 oz
28 August 98 over 5lb 8oz...
Christmas 98about 9 lb

I live to eat...

Suggestions for catfood manufacturers

The "stolen from the human table" range:

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Editor: Henry Felix Biddlecombe
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