My birthdate is 2nd April 98 so I'm an Aries. This picture shows me snoozing
at the age of about 3 months.
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About 9 o'clock, the lady human pours out some wonderful kitty milk, but apart from that I'm made to starve until the evening - they've reduced me to two meals a day! Occasionally supper includes special treats such as turkey, left-over fresh fish, or a sliver of Parmesan cheese.
The exertions of breakfast make a chap thoroughly somnolent, so the next few hours have to be spent on a sofa with head down and legs dangling off the edge. My favourite catnip-scented mouse often catches forty winks at the same time.
Just before luncheon I survey my estate for an hour or so and correct any
erroneous flower planting ideas that I notice, and chase away those of the
insect persuasion who attempt to invade. I now roam out of the garden, and like to
check out the riverbank and a few neighbouring gardens. I've noticed a few chaps
who look like me, but haven't met them properly yet.
In the middle of the day, the serious sleep of the day, 'el siesta', takes place. This can sometimes last until the male human comes through the front door with that Samsonite that I love to climb on; but sometimes I manage to rouse myself in time for another dash around the garden and a spot of tea.
The evening always includes a session of "physical jerks". These can include:
At bedtime I may sleep in my own basket downstairs, or on top of the drinks cabinet (7 ft) in the lounge. If I'm feeling more sociable, I go and kill human feet under the eiderdown before grabbing a patch of pillow when some chump is gullible enough to move his head.
| Date | Weight | |
| 2 April 98 | 5 oz |
|
| 5 June 98 | 1 lb 10 oz | |
| 13 June 98 | 1 lb 14 oz | |
| 19 June 98 | 2 lb 1 oz | |
| 27 June 98 | 2 lb 5 oz | |
| 5 July 98 | 2 lb 11 oz (burp!) | |
| 10 July 98 | 3 lb 0 oz | |
| 18 July 98 | 3 lb 4 oz | |
| 24 July 98 | 3 lb 12 oz | |
| 31 July 98 | 4 lb 1 oz | |
| 7 August 98 | 4 lb 7 oz | |
| 14 July 98 | 4 lb 12 oz | |
| 21 August 98 | 5lb 3 oz | |
| 28 August 98 | over 5lb 8oz... | |
| Christmas 98 | about 9 lb |
I live to eat...
Editor: Henry Felix Biddlecombe
Last change: